just taking up time

The World Series starts tonight. Nothing better will be on TV so everyone has no excuse for not watching it. Philadelphia vs Tampa Bay. I prefer that the Rays win because we have the same name. Mine being my middle name and their last name. It would make feel proud of that name for the second time ever.

Someone stank up the office building the other day by cooking broccoli. Building managers and other facility heads were worried about toilets leaking and other horrible sewage problems. Little did they know that it was someone just trying to enjoy freshly steamed veggies...Today I had cream of broccoli soup.

Softball was last and we managed to win two in a row. We finally felt what it was like to be champions. I didn't say too much after the game. Words just could not describe how the team felt in that moment.

Why are gum wrappers not cut on a straight edge? Do the jagged edges improve something? They remind me of teeth. Maybe it's designed in case a caveman time warps to 2008. Then he can associate the jagged edges with teeth and then know to chew the contents of the wrapper. Wrigley should be given more credit because of this ingenious idea.

Bought a computer for my bike. It's a piece of crap but it makes me feel like Lance Armstrong. Cruising along at a minimum speed the computer works great and proudly displays my 9.4 mph speed. Kick it up a gear and show off my power, the computer freaks out. I am too fast for this thing. Once the reading is over 11 mph, it looses all strength and gives up. I feel like David Levy.

My back hurts today. I feel that I should get worker's comp on this. If anyone wants to question me then I'll have them sit in my chair for 8 hours and do nothing all day. That would make anyone's back ache or probably something worse.

What Phillies slugger, upon seeing Lake Michigan for the firs time, asked: "What ocean is that"?

Last entry's answer was Whitey Ford with 10.

wedding number two was ok

Wedding number two of the season was short and sweet. Thank goodness because it was outside. There was plenty of unexpected entertainment though. No one thought in advance about the Friday night football game going on just half a mile away. Plenty of "Sonic Boom" from the band section.

My plane Thursday evening was delayed by 2 hours. I wasn't happy but I did get to sit with and meet the band Lifehouse. The drummer thought I was cool. That still did not raise my spirits for the plane being late. I'm pretty sure that Southwest Airlines strategically placed Lifehouse on the plane for purposes of cheering up the passengers for a delayed flight. I'm no sucker. For some reason, half way through the flight, I felt the need to listen to a few of their songs.

Went to the fair on Friday evening. Father Rob was convinced that the World's greatest cinnamon rolls were being sold there. I paid $4 and was upset that he claimed these were the World's greatest. They were good, but not the best. Sometimes I wonder about him. He wouldn't even pay one dollar to see the 100 Pound Rat or the Man Eating Snake. I didn't pay the dollar for the Man Eating Snake either. Utility Al did because he thought I had no more money. Who's the sucker now? Me for allowing someone to pay for me to look at the Man Eating Snake or him paying for me to see the Man Eating Snake?

Softball has been rained out for the second week in a row. I really think that the other team is scared of me. There is no way that rain can cause two cancels in a row.

The dentist in Mississippi thinks I'm poor. He only told me I had one cavity versus the dentist here in Houston that told me I have nine. He'll come out better in the long run by telling me about each one, one by one.

The bed at home hurt my back and I cried about to anyone that would listen.

Once again, I requested one simple thing for my return home. A cookie cake. There were numerous emails sent on this issue and I was for sure that this time there would be a massive cookie cake in my honor. The icing design had been chosen, the size and shape were determined, location and times were arranged for enjoyment. Everything was ready for order till Father Rob decided that three $4 cinnamon rolls at the fair would satisfy him instead. Everyone always thinks about themselves. I hope he can't finish the average breakfast treat and they go stale.

What pitcher has the most World Series victories?

Last entry's answer was ten.

the weekend wedding was just ok

I survived a wedding weekend in the Music City, barely. The only disappointments were that there was no rice to throw, I only got to walk down the aisle for the exit, the groom did not cry, our hotel was hosting the gray haired convention of Opry Land, and I didn't catch the garter. Whenever I get married and if by some freak accident I cry, I'll just leave right then to save myself the humility.

Garter makers should really consider adding a little extra elastic into their product.

Someone should kick me for not taking the $300 and catching a later flight on Sunday. Just don't kick me in the face.

Why is it called a restroom? If I ever own a super mall, movie theater or gas station I'll call it the reliefroom.

I was watching the beginning of Life, some TV show, last night and it proved to be very unrealistic. The smart detective was unable to figure out the automatic sink and soap dispenser. I turned it off and vowed to never watch it again.

Yesterday I wore a gray polo and froze. Today I'm wearing a green long sleeve button up and am still freezing. I hate my desk more than anything ever and the colors of my shirt do not matter.

Softball is tonight. I am going to predict a complete blowout by our team. By blowout I mean our team will win at any costs. I do mean by any costs.

Guy Who Played At LSU told me I have to buy him a lunch because his team beat mine. That is the worst idea ever. If anyone should be providing lunch it should be him. My team lost and I'm down. Getting him lunch will get me down even more because I'll be out a whole lunch. So, I told him tomorrow lunch will be on me. Lucky me, there will be a free lunch provided by NASA tomorrow that he knows nothing about.

Is interlocking fingers a more intimate way of holding hands? If so, me and my bride's maid were intimate together. The roommate and his bride's maid were not because she was married. She refused to interlock fingers and now they will look like total strangers in the pictures. He ruined the wedding photographs because of this. Except for those two where I didn't smile.

Lastly, the new Ben Folds CD comes out today. Go buy it, enjoy it or else.

What is the minimum number of musicians a band must have to be considered a "big band"?

Last entry's answer was cork.

i survived

I survived. Survived living with the parents at home in Mississippi that is. Ike sent me on a "hurrication" to the deep south. Spent a total of 10 days living in my old stomping grounds with the mom and the dad. They tried to get me to pull my weight around the house but I would politely remind them that I was an evacuee. It didn't work.

Some kindergartner tried to beat me up at church on Sunday. I told his mom.

I ticked someone off yesterday. Since most the the traffic lights are out around here, all intersections are on the honor system. First there, first to go. Just like a stop sign. Coming back from lunch, Mr Baldy didn't think I waited long enough at the line. That must have given him permission to show me just how much he disapproved of my actions. Not only did his left arm come out the window but his right arm as well. I'm guessing he didn't have the pastor in his car either after reading some of lip gestures.

Mississippi made me gain weight. Everywhere served sweet tea and would fry anything edible.

Louisiana, you have poor driving skills.

Throughout the entire 10 days at home I wore the same thing over and over again. Only expecting to stay there for 2 days, I packed accordingly.

Lynyrd Skynyrd took, "'y' is sometimes vowel' rule to the extreme.

I have turned into someone I never wanted to be. A television show fan. For the past two weeks I have been watching Lost. Heroes started back last night and The Office premieres on Thursday Evening. I have never felt like a middle aged woman more so than I do right now.

If only the worship service was like this at church every Sunday. I'd request the guy with the brown guitar for an encore.

Two things that someone showed me last week that left me speechless and scared. A baby and a cartoon. Do not click on the cartoon. It's like watching The Ring, something weird will happen.

What did Chris Sabo shower the field with when his bat broke in a July 31,1996 game?

Last entry's answer was five.

what to do?

My windshield was cleaned this morning by another vehicle. The man driving the Dodge hatchback apparently had a dirty windshield and felt it necessary to clean it while driving. In doing so, he sprayed my windshield with the excess washer fluid that missed his window. I wouldn't have minded but he almost came to a complete stop while spraying and wiping. Me being annoyed, decided to pass him to give him the thankful stare down. I look over at him and he's two knuckles deep into his left nostril. I watch in amazement.

If only I could sing like this guy.

Looks as if the hurricane bags are coming back out! It's always a riveting time when this momentous event happens.

Guy That Is In The Band always makes the weirdest comments. Everyone is talking about hurricanes for some reason and he chimes in about the live reporters at the storm. "One day some sign is going to come flying by and cut their head off." Did I mention that he always smiles when he talks?

"The clouds are forming
She comes again
I'll go and walk with her
Along the Seine

Soon she'll be storming
Here comes the wind
But that don't bother me
'Cause she's my friend

I love the rain"
-I Love the Rain by Lenny Kravitz

My first thought is that he is singing about a hurricane with a female name. If not that then, some weather lady on TV.

I laughed.

Two more days till the trip back to Mississippi State. I, myself, could not be more excited. I only wish I would have waited on the announcement to my boss about this decision. If JSC closes it's doors to Ike I will be ripped off on a free vacation day. I could just challenge the HR Lady and add it to my time sheet anyways. That will give her some much needed work to figure out.

What was the largest number of living ex-presidents at one time?

Last entry's answer was the 20 yard line.

assumptions make everything right

Word in the halls is that we might be knocked out of work Thursday and Friday. That is, if Mr Ike assumes his path towards Houston and does not loose any of his strength. This assumption is also assuming that Ike is a male.

Mississippi State managed to win the first game of the season by pounding some no-named school in Louisiana. Another assumption is assuming 34-10 is a pounding. I don't think it is but I wanted to use a term that would make us sound powerful and respectful. That last sentence probably messed everything up.

All weekend I watched football. My large mouth did not live up to the hype in fantasy league week one. If I had to put money on it, I would imagine that the league is rigged against me. It's like I am stuck in some sort of Truman Show plot.

I am a horrible gardener. At first I was proud of my skills for reviving two plants but now I am beginning to have second thoughts. I have killed two totally separate plants, twice each. The first is a member of the vine family and and now belongs to no family due to me dropping it completely out of the tub it was in. I did however, bring it back to life, only to kill it again. What was once green is now being consumed by brown and some yellowish color. The other, my favorite, is or was a pepper plant. It produces or produced green peppers that turn, yellow, then orange and finally red. Very cool. Now the entire plant is wilting away. This is the second time Oscar, figured I would give it a name since it is a favorite, has wilted away. I feel like giving up but I won't. There might be a third of even fourth life for these two.

I took the atomic fireball challenge just a few minutes ago. "I was man" are my exact words on how I performed. Never once removed it, except to see what color it was towards the very end. In case you were wondering, it turned white. My guess is that the red is the hot part.

What yard line must a football team drive to, to reach the "red zone"?

Last entry's answer was the San Francisco 49ers.

it's only 2:00, time is too slow at work

Someone is clipping their fingernails in the other office right now. It's so annoying and I cannot concentrate on anything at this very moment, except writing this sentence.

NFL regular season starts tonight. I told the guy that is playing me in fantasy football this weekend that he better have some players playing tonight so that he will have a head start because he will need it. Let it be known this is my first year to ever play fantasy football and I have no idea what I am doing.

This morning I pretended that weather was getting cooler. The air conditioner in my car was on and it had me thinking that the leaves would soon begin changing colors. Then I noticed that all the trees around were pines.

Thank goodness Apple put the little "R" and "L" on the earphones. Otherwise I would go crazy trying to determine which ear piece goes in which ear. If the right goes in the left ear the world is not right and I will hear everything backwards.

The LSU guy at work made some BBQ sauce and I took a bottle. It's taking everything in me to not drink it right now.

Going to Starkville, MS next weekend for some Bulldog Bash and the Miss St vs Auburn football game. The last time I went to a home game against Auburn I took the largest cowbell anyone has ever seen. Made the front sports page of multiple newspapers and even the beloved Mississippi State year book. My roommate was so proud.

I listened to my first full length speech by a politician last night. She held my attention the entire time. I have never felt more like an American citizen than I did last night. That was until Big and Rich came on to sing.

What NFL team was the first to win the Vince Lombardi trophy five times?

Last entry's answer was the Cincinnati Bengal's.