Wednesday, July 25, 2007

kissing

Don't ask about softball...This morning an ant was walking across my desk, I smashed it with my fist out rage from last night's game.

My experience in the restroom moments ago was anything but exciting and regular. I don't mean I wasn't regular. I am regular, but I just didn't need to at that moment. I should change my word usage. The restroom experience was not normal. A random guy in uniform walked in, looked at the wall, then left. I don't understand why. Continuing on, I made my way to the mirror and noticed that the collar on my shirt is rather large. It makes the rest of me look stupid. I'll never wear this shirt again. Maybe I could sell it for $7 on craigslist.com.

That was the worst paragraph ever written in the the history of paragraphs.

Old Guy just slammed his phone down on accident then picked it up to tell whoever was on the line that he was sorry. It was quite the event to hear. Soon after, he yelled my name for me to join him in his cubicle. There he asked if I knew how to do something on the computer, which I pretended to not know what a computer is, because it makes for more interesting instructions. To show me what to do Old Guy says, "Come, look over my shoulder." I chuckled. Apparently they think I'm an idiot when it comes to doing any type of work, especially using the computer, filing, or making copies. They always watch over my shoulder and explain everything in baby steps. I have an aerospace degree for crying out loud. What's that small thing connected to the computer box with the two buttons and wheel??

The girl who I named Sweet Lamb has turned me down for a kissing picture. I've never been turned down for a kiss. I might have made that up. But she did agree to a kiss on the cheek. I think I'll do the quick turn so I'll get the full lip to lip action.

Check this cool thing I found while surfing the web. www.coldpole.com

What interstate highway connects Boston and Seattle?

Last entry's answer was Joseph Stalin.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

i bet your mom even turns you down for a kiss on the cheek.

Kathy said...

Matt, your blog is so funny. I am going to keep reading it every day because it makes me laugh. If it's okay with you, I would like to add your link to my blog. If you'd like to visit mine, it's www.kathysklavier.blogspot.com
However, compared to yours, it might be a little boring. But there is a cute picture of my daughter.

Anonymous said...

matt, i feel the need to apologize. i have been a little brutal in these blog comments to you. i must confess that i am jealous of you and your witty blog posts that i could never come up with myself (as you can tell from my idiotic "cosmonaut" post) anyway, please accept my apology

Anonymous said...

the above post is not from the true anne onymous. the true anne onymous hates your guts.

Anonymous said...

Impostor! I dont know who you are "anne onymous above me" but I know the truth! and the truth is I, the one true anne onymous, love matt with all my heart and wish that he would ask me for a kiss.

Anonymous said...

i told you to stop posting on your own comment board matt dees.

Anonymous said...

Oh dear, my split personalities are fighting for blogspace again. I'm such a loser, I don't have my own blog because I have nothing intelligent to say. Read my comments and you will agree. I am so sorry to be such an asswipe.