awkward
This post is very much unlike the other posts. Sorry in advance.
So last night around 7:30 me and Miss Elliptical, the new girl I met in the weight room, put in “Ocean's Thirteen,” cut all the lights out, and sit down on the couch to enjoy a nice evening. Roommate was MIA, notice the tie on the door. First time the new couch has had occupants of two. No more flying solo on the sofa.
Not to be gross, but just as things were getting rather intimate we hear a, BANG, BANG on the door. “Oh shit” is what I believe Miss Elliptical said. I peak out the peep hole, but can’t tell who it is because of the dang wreath on the door. I knew that thing would be a pain in butt and make us look gay. I figure it’s one of the neighbors just stopping by trying thier best to be annoying or something. I dash into the bedroom and put some old sweat pants on. Unlock the door, crack open the door and it turns out to be the preacher from the church service on Sunday along with two ladies from the congregation.
"We are the visitees of the ABC 123 Baptist Church visitation group." I’m shocked while standing in the hall, frantically thinking to myself, oh crap… am I dressed decent, is the apartment a wreck (yes), is there anything that they might see that will embarrass the crap out of me (probably), will Miss Elliptical be decent? I’m barely standing in the doorway and they are already asking themselves in so I can’t run inside and check the decentcy very quick like.
They come in and take a seat on my awesomely cool sofa as I start throwing crap behind the chairs and then sit. About 5 minutes later Miss Elliptical emerges from my room. They seem somewhat shocked. "Oh, Mr Matt, is this your wife." Ok, they didn't say that but I was sure hoping they wouldn't. I offered them water and some wine and crackers since this is all we have. They laughed. The whole thing was very uncomfortable for me and especially Miss Elliptical.
I'm pretty sure that Miss Elliptical will change her workout routine from every afternoon about 6:00 to every morning at 7:00 just to be safe. She was a cutie.
What is emetophobia?
Last entry's answer was fear of chins.
19 comments:
Bad timing!
Well ! After the many mojo emails yesterday, you didn’t even tell me you were using yours last night.
Whatever, thought we were friends.
Niiiice. You should of answered the door naked. I would have. Then again, I like to shock church people. (I bet they wouldn't have invited themselves in!)
Wait, people can have a fear of chins? Their own, or others? If it's their own, they can't really escape that.
Gosh Matt, I feel like I'm your mother peeking in on your personal life. I'm just gonna pretend I didn't even read this post, ok?
Way to go pimp.
I think the answer is fear of taking a dump.
Ha Ha you werent kidding, that is awkward. God is always watching you young man. Thats what you get for covering up your peep hole. I still wouldnt have answered it if I were you.
Fear of mouths? I dont know. Whats with the phobia questions?
Picking up a girl at the gym?
Plus one point.
Um, whatever happened to just saying "NO"?
I'm going to guess the fear of church people knocking on your door when you're trying to hook up with the girl from the gym...
Why would you let them in? That's nuts!
That is such a funny story!!!
You should have pretended you wer' nt home !!!
There's nothing like a couple of Baptists breaking up a heavy petting session, is there?
Oh my, that is too funny...
I only know this because... well, it doesn't matter how I know this...
fear of vomiting. eew.
And I was catching up, because I missed Friday's, and read it first, not realizing there was a post today, so I promise I didn't cheat! LOL!
um, so did you get some after all... everyone's congratulating you but it seems to me maybe you didnt 'seal the deal'!! haha
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